Standing On The Verge (of a nervous breakdown)

Is there anybody there?
Ooh, it’s quite spacious on this page now that everyone has gone. Very 2016 with it’s minimal look.
Well I just dropped by to say a quick ‘hello.’
So, what’s been happening?
Not much, except I fear that my sanity is about to break up with me.


At the same time, Insanity keeps knocking at my door and asking me if I want to come out and play. I don’t but it just won’t take no for an answer. I feel like a woman on the verge of a nervous breakdown, though I’m not too sure why the breakdown should be the one feeling so nervous. The thing is, I like the verge and I don’t really want to cross it. The verge is soft and squidgy under my feet but Insanity isn’t playing fair and is being mean and spiteful. It keeps trying to push me over the verge and into the breakdown…I want to punch it in the metaphorical face.


I’m guessing that the constant pain, the absence of chocolate and the definite lack of sleep has put me in the place where I am now, and it’s certainly been a long time since I visited the ‘Land of Nod.’ This would probably explain why I keep wailing like a banshee over the most simplest of things.
When I stubbed my toe, I fell to my knees and bawled like somebody had told me that my dog had just died…and I don’t even have a dog.
And when a fly landed on my shoulder, I hysterically exclaimed:
“Fly, why are you victimising me so?! Am I so wretched a creature that you would mistake me for  a compact mass of substance otherwise termed as poop?! Oh fly, why do you torment me so?? I tend to get a bit dramatic whilst standing on the

By now, even Insanity was having second thoughts about playing with me and Nervous Breakdown was practically having…well, a nervous breakdown, all the while babbling like a brook.
“For heaven’s sake!” Cried Dignity, “get a bloody grip woman, have you no shame?” To which I could only reply, “no, he’s run off with Sanity… the treacherous two-timing bastard.”
After about 30 minutes, Calm decided to intervene and take control of the situation.
“Okay emotions, everyone step away, there’s nothing to see here. Come on, give the woman some breathing room.” But alas, all the breathing rooms were locked and I started to hyperventilate until Calm soothed me once again.


Last night, Sanity came back and begged to be let back in, although there was a bit of an altercation with Insanity. After Sanity had kicked it in the proverbial gonads and Nervous Breakdown had stopped breaking down long enough to gather enough courage to happy slap it across it’s abstract face, Insanity left whimpering that it would be back soon and  that I hadn’t heard the last of it, not by a long shot.
I took Dignity’s advice and decided to get a grip but Grip kept moaning like a bitch that I was holding on too tight.
Shame came back too and together with my companions, Peace, Calm and Tiredness, we all decided to go on a long awaited vacation to the ‘Land of Nod.’


34 thoughts on “Standing On The Verge (of a nervous breakdown)

  1. Well bless my soul, blow me down and tickle me wiv a frushes feavver. You am back! Oh, I am so pleased that you stepped back from the verge and didn’t join those bloody chickens crossing the road. Dangerous that, crossing the road. Not only are you back but once again laughing in the face of adversity. You are in fine form after your therapy with gloom and nervous and those other things.
    Nice to have you back girlie

    Liked by 1 person

    • Found your comment!
      Not only do I laugh in the face of adversity, but I also give it a swift kick to the groin before then tackling it into a headlock.

      Thanks again. It’s good to be back, although I’m not sure how long I’ll be staying.


  2. Just tried to leave a witty comment but the interweb decided it wasn’t witty and shot it off into wherever non witty comments on the interweb thingy get shot off to.
    Nice to have you back girlie and good to see you are in fine form and laughing in the face of something or other. Enjoy the land of nod. I hear the beaches there are very nice. X

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Mr D. 🙂
      Thought I’d try out my brand new laptop with a post. This is about the 7th one in 7 years…laptop that is, not post. Tip to the wise, never buy an Asus computer.

      Loving the beaches in the land of nod. They’re full of marshmallow dragons and chocolate covered torsos. My dream tongue is tired, what with licking all those tasty dragons. 😉


  3. Welcome back, sweetie. We’ve missed you. Sorry to hear you’ve been through such a rough spell. Mmmmmmmm. Feel that? It was a virtual hug. Not as good as a real one, but it’ll have to do. Take care of yourself.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Susan and I truly have missed everyone. But these damned illnesses are getting in the way of blogging…spiteful buggers.
      And a virtual hug is just as good as a real one, because the person sending it cares. So wrapping myself up in your hug and feeling very grateful. 🙂


  4. Hello Miss Lily I am always pleased to see you back. OK I will admit that I have been off away doing stuff and even now am not back yet properly for many reasons. You see blogging almost every night was truly unsustainable as you will have now discovered by my own long absence

    However despite the pursuit to create Shed of the year 2099 and getting enough artwork ready for a December exhibition I have paused everything to read your post and say a big hello waving a cheery wave and wishing you well. We are all, (as you can see) really really pleased to see you back in cyberspace. . . . . .

    I will also be back but not quite yet, just too much to do

    Say hello to Master Meglos I bet he is shooting up and will soon be able to pick you up and tape you into a box . . . . . I used to do that to the grand kids once but they got big enough to fight back . . . . . DAMN

    Liked by 1 person

    • Mr Z, Oh how I’ve missed you. You and Mr H, who is now Mr F, are among my oldest blogging pals on the interweb.
      Oh my lord! You have an exhibition in December?!! Congrats, you wonderful man. Of course I’m biased as I’ve always loved everything that you’ve done, and it’s not just cos you pay me. Seriously, I’m so happy for you. 🙂 I did notice your absence, but that’s all part and parcel of becoming an international, jet-setting, renown artist.
      Master Meglos is indeed shooting up… I mean growth wise, not class A drugs wise. I now have to stand on top of the stairs in order to beat him…I mean to be as tall as him…ahem…*coughs*
      Take care Mr Z. Going over to catch up on your blog.


      • The Exhibition will be rather low key, just a smallish room in small local museum so not quite international. Sorry not much on the blog at present but as I have said I will be back. The real world requires several things to be sorted before I can chill and I need to make the most of the decent weather.

        Hang in there Miss Lily I’m sure all will be good in the end after all that’s what folk have always told me and I turned into a grumpy bastard so it just goes to show?

        Liked by 1 person

  5. If it hadn’t been for the fact I was at work when your post arrived in my inbox, I would have climbed on my desk and performed a happy dance. Oh hell, maybe I will anyway, self-respect be damned.
    So glad to have you back. I admit I checked in on you from time to time, wondering if I missed something by chance. I’m not saying this to make you feel guilty or anything. I just wanted you to know that even in the cyber-universe, there are people who care about you.
    Weird, demented people, sure. But people just the same. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • Meh, self respect is overrated anyway.
      Ah, thank you Christie, you’ve just given me the warm and the fuzzies. I’m honestly moved that you kept checking back and that you care. Thank you for that. 🙂
      Weird, demented people are my people. Their brand of craziness is what makes my world go round.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Hello, Hello Lily! In some ways I can relate because I’m often on the verge of a breakdown or something myself, and sometimes I’m not even quite sure what it is. Maybe it’s just that kind of year or time of life. I get to feeling blue over stuff in my personal life and then I have to smack myself right out of that pity party. I sure understand how you’d feel the way you do being in constant pain with no chocolate (No chocolate? Oh no!) and lack of sleep. 😦 If you venture too close to the edge though, I’ll join you there and I’ll swat away the flies, ‘cause that’s what friends are for!

    Lily, I love the way you brought those emotions to life as characters, and I love the way you always find the humor in whatever is happening. Calm singing that song just cracked me up LOL! Happy to see you posting again. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Madilyn, it really has been that kind of year. I know your life has not been an easy, so I get why you’ve been on the verge. Like you, I have my pity party for one and then tell myself to ‘fix up bitch.’ And don’t worry, the chocolate situation has now been amended, and therefore, a major crisis averted.

      Oh I LOVE that you would stand on the verge with me and swat away flies. Now THAT’s friendship. 😀

      I think I may have a type of synaesthesia, because I assign personalities to everything, including emotions, numbers, letters and colours. But having Calm singing ‘One Love,’ made me laugh whilst I was writing it.
      Thanks Madilyn. 🙂 xx

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Oh, Miss Lily, I missed you!
    I didn’t see you on the verge, but that is probably ’cause I was on my own one on my side of the world, well the backward, middle, front bit of a wobbly, slightly dodgy, “could fall off the face of the earth and I wouldn’t care just now” type of one. I have backed off mine a bit, but it took resigning from work to achieve it. I was going to write a post about it but just don’t have the emotional energy to do so at the moment, maybe next week, month or year.
    Sorry to hear about the sleeping thing – I can get to sleep, it’s just the waking a multitudes of times a night that is interrupting the sleeping that has me peeved. Honestly, if you’ve made the huge commitment to stop thinking about everything that is jittering around in your head, and laid your body down in your soft, cosy bed, the least your damn brain can do is respect that and let you sleep without interruption!
    Anyways, may your verge turn into a soft marshmallow couch where you can lie and dream of chocolate and rainbow dragons to your hearts content.
    Much, much hugs for strengthening the urge to resist the verge.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh Claudette, I so feel you in this comment. Not in a pervy, stalky, watching you through the bathroom window way, but on a more emphatic level. And I also get having to give up working. 😦 Like you, I can sleep, but I can’t stay asleep. It’s that restless, tossing and turning, every sound/movement awakens, a million things suddenly running through my mind, kinda sleep that leaves you more tired, and the only way to remedy that is to…yep, sleep, which of course doesn’t happen.
      May YOUR verge turn into the cosiest of beds, where the hot nights are fanned away by the feathers of the most exotic birds and where dreams lead to a magical land of peace, love and hope.
      Wishing you nothing but love and warm hugs.

      I really would love to read about your own experiences of standing on the verge, but I understand all too well the energy that it takes to do so.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Hope you know that Support and Friendship are standing on the sidelines just waiting to be called upon. I’m glad that the Chocolate Crisis of 2016 has been averted. I might have had to stockpile otherwise. Hell, I might just do that anyway.
    Virtual hug and squeeze always on offer (( ))

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Have you met my friend, Polly Grip, Lily? She’s really good at helping people hold onto things, and she’s water resistant too.

    There was a big squabble over gender-neutral breathing rooms here in the U.S., as if people were embarrassed to have someone of the opposite sex see them breath (I could understand it if they were panting).

    Personally, I think Sanity is overrated.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ah, Polly must be related to Get A Grip. I encounter him almost daily and he’s a bit of a harsh bastard.
      Breathing is kind of a private thing. Especially when it’s done whilst staring at someone through a spy hole, so I’m on the side of the non neutral breathing rooms. And sanity rebukes your claim that it is overrated and is instead, pointing the finger at the acting ability of Ben Affleck.

      Liked by 1 person

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