Folks, I must humbly apologise to you all. For not only have I been consumed with the challenge of murdering the English language throughout the month of April, but I have been remiss in my duty of not putting my box out there for public display. Now those of you who are no stranger to Incoherent Ramblings, know all too well that I like to open up my box and exhibit it at every opportunity.
As a youngster, my mother would dismay at the fact that I was always fingering my box. But what was the point of having such a thing if one could not derive pleasure from it? Now I am much older, I welcome anyone who wishes to do so, to take a peek inside my box and to finger (very carefully) it’s goods.
So, what do I have inside my music box for you all today then?
First in our pile of musical goodies, is Fingerless Fiddler Roy Thackerson.
Reworking such classics as the Beatles’ I Wanna Hold Your Hand (but my stumps won’t let me), T’pau’s China In Your Hands (keeps slipping to the floor) and the children’s favourite Tommy Thumb Where Are You? I’m sure that you’ll all agree that this album is finger lickin’ good.
Here we have the love doctor himself, Dr D with his collection of ‘Luv Songs’ from the album Put Out The Fires Of Desires. No problem Dr D. Not only have I put out the flames of desire after looking at your picture, but I have also smothered it, bashed in it’s head with a blunt implement, re-set it on fire just so that I could smother it again, cussed it’s mother and then buried it in the back garden…oh no wait…that was my ex…
Moving on swiftly, the next album is a testimony to what happens if you don’t stay in school and study. Wendell Clarke had high ambitions of being a top Gynaecologist, but his partying ways and sex addiction, soon led to his downfall. Now instead of studying the flowery essence of the female garden, Wendell has a new identity and now studies an altogether more fragrant part of the body as charted in this autobiographical album.
Mr Del Ray, I don’t think any of us needs reminding of the sounds of a man alone…
Next up in my box of musical delights, comes the blessed tones of Orvel and Orvella as they implore the Lord to lay his healing hands upon them.
Also clamouring for the hands of our Saviour, the Simmons family boast about their godly encounter with the beautifully inspired album The Touch Of God.
And here’s little Greg Kendrick with his version of events.
Last and by no means least, this heartbreaking album from the Hanleys was composed as a plea to their missing daughter Ally Louia who sadly went missing some months previously. Soon after the release of this album, Ally Louia’s decomposed body was found inside Mrs Hanley’s bouffant, along with a circus midget, a Boeing 747, an assortment of woodland creatures and the lost city of Aztian.
And that sadly concludes our musical entertainment for this month. Join me next time for another gander at my open box. You’re all welcomed to have a good fiddle about with it in the meantime.